Showing posts with label Ballard. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ballard. Show all posts

Kevin Potts - Ballard 2000-07

Your Name

Kevin Potts

Gender

Male

Which describes your role at Mars Hill?

Member, Group Leader (any leadership role)

What Mars Hill location(s) did you attend?

Ballard

What years were you involved / attending?

2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007

How did you first hear about Mars Hill?

A friend of mine in Dallas had found the church for me online. I was living in Everett at the time, and she didn't realize that Seattle was as far south from Everett as it was, but she had found the website when I'd mentioned I was looking for a church to attend.

What was the circumstance of your first time attending Mars HIll?

I walked in around January of 2000 when the church was meeting at First Presbyterian in downtown Seattle. It immediately felt like home: dim lighting, good music, dynamic preaching, and at the time there were enough people there to make it feel populated without it feeling overwhelming like the larger (several hundred) church I'd left in northern Washington

What were your first impressions?

I loved the focus on art, on cultural relevance, and the lack of how "churchy" it felt. I was involved in a writing workshop within a couple weeks, and had joined as a member within 3 months of first walking in.

Why was Mars Hill your church home?

I felt welcomed, I could involve myself, I liked the people, and I liked that it engaged with culture at the time instead of hiding from and vilifying it like so many other churches I'd gone to. I could be the guy who could talk about listening to heavy metal, I could show up in a t-shirt and jeans, and the people were engaging, intelligent, and not steeped in the subculture of Christianity.

What about your time at Mars Hill has had a positive impact on you?

I came away from my time there with a greater appreciation for legitimate Bible study, and not merely topical sermons. The focus on "Meaning, Beauty, Truth, Community" resonated with me, because they were all things I wanted from life, and there were legitimate efforts being made in the early days at incorporating all those elements into daily life through the lens of the Bible.

What about your time at Mars Hill has had a negative impact on you?

The bombastic growth led to a shattering of a sense of community. The abuses of authority by not only Mark Driscoll but other leaders soured me on the idea of top-down authority. Being told to be quiet and take what we were spoonfed instead of questioning everything rankled. I remember at one point watching Mark lose his temper when people were waiting for the service to start, and some production staff were playing foosball in the green room at the Ballard location. He blew up for no reason I could see, and immediately retreated to being upset that there were a couple ladies who were standing while some guys were seated, as he couldn't really zero in on anything else to justify his outburst (in reality I think he just wanted some quiet, but the band's green room isn't the best place to find that...). When I went to my production lead (I was a stage manager) and told him that it was rude the way Mark had talked to the people who worked under me, and that if he had some concerns they should be brought to me, my lead came back a service later with the statement that Mark was in the right, and we just needed to do what he said.

It was at that point I realized things started to go south. From there, things only got worse, culminating in the abomination that was the firing of Paul Petry and Bent Meyer, and the awful way the church handled that scenario, and subsequent events surrounding discipline contracts, unquestioned authority, and the ever-growing beast that was Mark Driscoll's P.R. machine.

What would you like to have changed about Mars Hill?

I think in retrospect that there isn't a lot of good that can come from churches once they reach a certain size, aside from greater resource availability. I think in order for leadership to remain humble and involved in their congregants' lives, their congregations need to be smaller than any given campus at Mars Hill was at the time of its closure. I think in retrospect Mars Hill should have considered making the individual campuses autonomous church plants instead of satellites within a network that just received content streamed from first Ballard, then Bellevue. If that centralized authority hadn't existed, shored up by the cult of personality surrounding Mark, I think a lot of the problems could have been ameliorated or even removed entirely without it ending in shambles and damage the way it did.

Which describes you?

I left Mars Hill prior to closure.

Please describe why you left Mars Hill and what that experience was like.

I left Mars Hill at the end of 2007, just prior to the start of my 8th year there. Mark had started an "Ask Anything" site with voting and anonymous commentary capabilities, with the intent of taking the top 8 most highly-voted questions and using them for a sermon series. Some people were using the comments section to make anonymous comments expressing concern over how the Petry/Meyer situation had been handled.

Concurrently, on the password-protected member's site, discussion was happening over that same situation, and someone noted that it would "be a shame if leadership had to start looking at IP addresses of the comments on the Ask Anything site and compare them against IP addresses of people logging into the member's site to figure out which members were being divisive and hiding behind anonymity." I implored them in that discussion to do nothing of the sort, noting people were upset with some leaders at that point, and doing something like that wouldn't engender the trust the leadership would require to be able to resolve the situation peacefully and completely.

One of the pastors had asked me if I was a particular individual posting on the Ask Anything site as "Concerned". I indicated I wasn't. He came back and said that he believed I was, as that individual's posts echoed comments I had made in my exit interview from the production department (I was transitioning from Ballard to the Lake City campus). In that interview, I had noted dissatisfaction with how the Petry/Meyer situation had been handled, and said, "It would be easy to cause division with how well-connected I am in the church, but I have no interest in doing that." That got reported to the leadership as "Potts is going to cause division in the church."

Those two things together resulted in my membership being suspended by the pastor who didn't believe me when I said I wasn't the individual on the "Ask Anything" site who was posting the commentary they didn't like. This pastor had indicated that he and two other pastors had concluded I was "in sin" (without anyone having spoken to me about it to give me a chance to explain/defend myself). After much thought and prayer, I concluded they weren't interested in the truth, they were interested in me acknowledging their authority and saying I was wrong, so they could save face and not have their authority undermined by having to admit they'd made a mistake. I chose to leave. Interestingly, Driscoll was my landlord at the time; not trusting him or his assistant to do the right thing, I had begun quietly moving my possessions to a storage unit so I could be out of the house within 24 hours if that scenario came to pass (it didn't; Driscoll later merely chose to try to sell the house out from under the tenants by getting people to voluntarily sign away their leases, and merely giving 20 days notice-to-vacate to those who were on month-to-month arrangements).

How would you describe the reason for Mars Hill's closure to an outsider.

Mars Hill closed because a pastor started believing his own hype and started behaving as though the church was about him. When people tried to lovingly correct him and bring things back under control, he dug in, and eventually, when the leadership finally acknowledged it was time to put him under a formal discipline/restoration program, he left instead of face those consequences of his actions. The sad thing is he was right: he *was* Mars Hill, and once he was gone, the church folded.

What's changed for you since your time at Mars Hill came to an end?

I came perilously close to becoming an atheist, and even made a couple of statements to that effect. I don't trust church authority, though that's slowly changing. I refuse to join as a formal member at any church (though I'm now attending one again).

I believe it's more important to just be in relationship with people in your life, and let the Gospel work through that according to Jesus' timing and supernatural intervention. He can change hearts, man can't, no matter how much we try. Instead of spending time with people because you attend a Bible study together, I'd rather just be friends with people I'd be friends with regardless of religious or spiritual beliefs, and let the Gospel work itself out as Jesus wants through that. I believe far too often the greatest obstacles to people wanting to hear the Gospel are the people who are trying to preach it by shoving it down peoples' throats and using it as a hammer to make others behave as they want or think people should. I can't be that person, and actively work not to be.

I have an inherent distrust and dislike of the formal subculture of Christianity, for a variety of reasons too nuanced to communicate well in written form, without writing a novel (as though this one isn't already). I want nothing to do with it. I want to see people living their lives, coming to Jesus when they answer His call to their hearts and minds, in His timing, not mine. If I'm given the honor and blessing of being the person who leads them to Christ, all the better, but one way or the other, I'm here to live my life and be involved in theirs as long as they want me to be, and to peacefully leave if they don't.

That period of anger is past, and the period of mental and spiritual exhaustion in its wake is passing.

There's a light at the end of the tunnel, and I'm fairly confident again that it's Jesus.

Kyle - Ballard, Shoreline 2004-14

Your Name

Kyle

Gender

Male

Which describes your role at Mars Hill?

Regular Attender, Member

What Mars Hill location(s) did you attend?

Ballard, Shoreline

What years were you involved / attending?

2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014

How did you first hear about Mars Hill?

My sister introduced me to the Mars Hill podcast in 2003 when Mark was preaching through Revelation.

What was the circumstance of your first time attending Mars HIll?

Having listened online through Revelation and 1+2 Timothy I wanted to hear Mark preach live when he started Genesis in 2004.

What were your first impressions?

I was hooked. I'd heard music online so I knew it was very well done, but in person it was quite amazing -- felt like a concert. It was dark and there were large candelabras flanking the stage with burning candles; it felt "cool" yet "holy" at the same time.

It seemed... important? At the time I treated the polished production as the result of God being at work with the church.

Having just turned 18 and trying to find my place in the world, I found Mark's pounding home of topics on masculinity to resonate deeply.

Why was Mars Hill your church home?

As I heard Mark preach on topics of culture and as I read various "emerging church" books (including Radical Reformission) I was drawn to the idea of being a missionary at home and living a life engaged with culture.

I came from a very conservative/fundamentalist Christian background where culture was seen as enemy. Embracing culture as not intrinsically bad but as something to be accepted/redeemed/rejected was a useful way to make sense of the world.

I'd been very involved with the local baptist church I grew up throughout high school in, but they saw culture as an enemy and something to be at war with. So attending Mars Hill regularly and serving was "just natural" in many ways.

What about your time at Mars Hill has had a positive impact on you?

While I don't think the theology at Mars Hill was particularly "freeing," it was much more so than the theology I grew up with. And that was helpful early on especially.

Coming from an incredibly conservative/fundamentalist/isolated background, Mars Hill was the first place I found friends (of which I've kept a very few).

Mark's teaching gave me a framework from which to understand the world (the framework given to me growing up did not work in "the real world"), although I'd later find that framework to be flawed and fall apart.

Early on, my career was largely built through connections made at Mars Hill.

Being able to serve on productions teams was often enjoyable and allowed me to develop skills and knowledge I wouldn't have otherwise. It also served as an early way to develop my leadership skills.

What about your time at Mars Hill has had a negative impact on you?

Rampant spiritual abuse. Central to that was authoritarian theology. It touched everything including: ideas of gender, ideas of masculinity/femininity, "gender roles," relationships, church leadership, discipline, philosophical conceptions of truth/certainty/meaning, and ethics.

What would you like to have changed about Mars Hill?

Had Mars Hill been able to move away from all of the extremely authoritarian theology/ideology, it would've become a veeery different place (hopefully for the better).

Which describes you?

I left Mars Hill prior to closure.

Please describe why you left Mars Hill and what that experience was like.

WORLD broke the story of Mark buying his way onto the NYTimes bestseller list. What Mark did was extremely unethical and it bothered me deeply. What bothered me more was how few people I knew at Mars Hill saw the ethical issue -- most rushed to defend Mark.

I already had other issues such as feeling like I didn't "fit in" at Mars Hill, particularly as I saw my theological beliefs changing over the years.

After trying to have real conversations with fellow Martians for three months and finding out that so few wanted to actually engage with the issues of Mark's actions, I realized I needed to try to find a different church.

Leaving was traumatic. It broke my world. To this day I am estranged from family who stayed at Mars Hill to the end and views me as an enemy who tore down their church. Most of my friends went to Mars Hill and most of them cut off all contact with me fairly quickly; after Mark's sermon on "wolves" I was labelled one by people I had been good friends with for years. I kept thinking "surely Mark will see his error" and everything would be back to normal, but that never happened.

I remember being so excited when A29 killed out Mars Hill. "This is it, at last Mark will see his error," I thought. A few hours later when it became apparent that was not the case, I was soooo devastated. I just wanted my friends and family back. And because of their blind devotion to Mark, that meant Mark needed to publicly own his wrongs and change his ways.

How would you describe the reason for Mars Hill's closure to an outsider.

Mark and the other executive elders were highly unethical, abusive, liars, and probably crooks. Enough people saw that and wouldn't put up with it. Like the coward he is, Mark ran off (he made a stop at the bank on the way) while proclaiming his innocence.

What's changed for you since your time at Mars Hill came to an end?

Almost everything.

I spent the first 27 years of my life in the church. After leaving Mars Hill (March 2014) I spent the next ten months trying to find a new church while watching Mars Hill slowly implode. Watching from the outside, being estranged from friends and family... it was traumatic, revealing, and changed me.

Leaving Mars Hill broke my world. But, in February 2015 I realized the god that the Bible speaks of did not exist. And slowly the pieces of everything that happened at Mars Hill started fitting together for me.

I don't think Christianity is necessarily bad or evil. It gives many of my closest friends deep meaning in their lives -- as it once did me. But I no longer believe its claims must be true to provide that meaning. And while Mars Hill was only a small part of my life, the trauma of leaving Mars Hill gave me a unique opportunity to reevaluate my life and examine the claims of the Bible.

Today I'm an agnostic, although I tend to live life "as an atheist." Embracing the values of secular humanism has enabled me to rebuild my life and make sense of it.

Member - Ballard, Downtown Seattle 2006-10

Gender

Female

Which describes your role at Mars Hill?

Member

What Mars Hill location(s) did you attend?

Ballard, Downtown Seattle

What years were you involved / attending?

2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010

How did you first hear about Mars Hill?

I was dating someone who claimed to be christian. I at the time was not and challenged them to actually go to church if they were claiming to be a christian. A quick internet search found mars hill Ballard and I agreed to go check it out with them.

What were your first impressions?

I was relieved it was full of people not dressed in their Sunday best and I saw lots of tattoos. For the first time I didn't stick out like a sore thumb or get lots of nasty or pitying looks.

Why was Mars Hill your church home?

I fit in, felt loved, challenged and sought after. I was able to grow in my faith without judgment.

What about your time at Mars Hill has had a positive impact on you?

I was saved there!

What about your time at Mars Hill has had a negative impact on you?

A few years before everything happened we were forced to move out of state. Watching everything happen over the internet was hard. Especially since i knew my church home was no longer there for me to come back to. Once all the allegations came out I started questioning everything I believed and what doctrine I had put into my life. Was what I believed bible based or Mark based? I had a hard time trusting churches.

What would you like to have changed about Mars Hill?

More transparency. Sure change is good sometimes, but why so much? People were leaving and being shuffled around all the time. No one ever talked about what was really happening. Also, I love mark. I love his ability to speak into my life and move me towards Christ. I had never heard a preacher like him before going to mars hill. I did feel that he had been elevated to a God like status in the church. Whether it was by his doing or not, more approachability would have helped him not be so 'untouchable'.

Which describes you?

I left Mars Hill prior to closure.

Please describe why you left Mars Hill and what that experience was like.

We left because financial hardship had forced my husband to join the military so we could afford to support children we wanted to have. It was very hard. Mars hill was our family and they were there for us through the good times and walked us through the bad.

How would you describe the reason for Mars Hill's closure to an outsider.

Lack of checks and balances on the part of the higher ups. Marks' anger and deceit.

What's changed for you since your time at Mars Hill came to an end?

I've dug into the bible more and stood more firmly in my beliefs. I'm more fearful of joining churches and have a hard time committing to membership.

Please write anything else you'd like to add.

I learned so much from the community at Mars Hill. I grew as a Christian. I went through redemption groups twice and learned something new each time and dug up past hurts and was able to work on healing. My marriage was redeemed. We were newly married and heading towards divorce, we went through some (what felt like) radical counseling that, through God, saved our marriage and allowed us to renew our vows and grow together.  We are now married 6 years and would not be here today with the support of our community group and some pastors at Mars Hill.

Member - Ballard, Bellevue, Shoreline, West Seattle 2005-13

Gender

Female

Which describes your role at Mars Hill?

Member

What Mars Hill location(s) did you attend?

Ballard, Bellevue, Shoreline, West Seattle

What years were you involved / attending?

2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013

Which describes you?

I left Mars Hill prior to closure.

Please describe why you left Mars Hill and what that experience was like.

We had a baby and it was a hard season of adjustment to get to church/community groups.  

What's changed for you since your time at Mars Hill came to an end?

Sadness for a broken family of believers

Please write anything else you'd like to add.

Other than feeling very sad for this church ending I wasn't part of the big upset.  Many are feeling grieved and emotionally hurt.  Perhaps my lack of involvement sheltered me from the pain?  I think that speaks more to my Lukewarm heart for the church, not necessarily my experience with MH directly. My heart goes out to those deeply hurting.  It will take a very long time to heal those emotional wounds.

Member - Ballard, Downtown Seattle, Rainier Valley, West Seattle 2000-13

Gender

Female

Which describes your role at Mars Hill?

Member, Group Leader (any leadership role)

What Mars Hill location(s) did you attend?

Ballard, Downtown Seattle, Rainier Valley, West Seattle

What years were you involved / attending?

2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013

How did you first hear about Mars Hill?

My boyfriend's coworker told him about MH, suggesting we may like it.

What was the circumstance of your first time attending Mars HIll?

I wasn't a believer but my boyfriend was. He asked me to go to church with him.

What were your first impressions?

People seemed genuinely friendly, not fake or super righteous. I enjoyed the sermon because I felt like I was really learning, not just about God, but history too.

Why was Mars Hill your church home?

We both felt it was the perfect combination of learning the Bible and how it's relevant to our lives in the present. Friendships were genuine and we appreciated the community.

What about your time at Mars Hill has had a positive impact on you?

See above.

What about your time at Mars Hill has had a negative impact on you?

Those friendships turned out to be not as genuine as we thought. As the church became multi campus, those friends soon became more invested in their new communities. It felt like we were friends out of convenience, so there was a sense of loss. Leadership became unapproachable which also contributed to that feeling.
The teaching from the pulpit permeated throughout community groups and staff and I became "lesser" as a female all across the board. The part of me that was strong and capable used to be valued and was appreciated in the leadership role I had. Then it became the very thing that was used against me because "I was preventing my husband from leading".

What would you like to have changed about Mars Hill?

Honesty.

Which describes you?

I left Mars Hill prior to closure.

Please describe why you left Mars Hill and what that experience was like.

I wanted to leave when Bent & Paul were fired but my husband wasn't ready. When we left in 3/13, we both felt called to go.
We left when the Result Source scandal surfaced, but there were compounding issues that led up to it as well.
Leadership became abusive in sin hunting and their actions/counsel devoid of grace.
When we left, all relationships ended.

How would you describe the reason for Mars Hill's closure to an outsider.

Pride and dishonesty in leadership.

What's changed for you since your time at Mars Hill came to an end?

We haven't been to church since, with the exception of a handful of times checking out different churches.
We nearly got divorced and are still feeling the repercussions of MH's teaching on marriage.

Please write anything else you'd like to add.

Mark Driscoll is a coward and I struggle not to hate him for what he's done. Displacing *thousands* of people from church is unconscionable.